I am North

Growing up in New Jersey, I always felt like I was in between northern and southern United States. I was neither too far north, nor considered myself to live in the south. My placement in New Jersey is exactly the same in comparison to the country. I grew up in Somerset County, in central Jersey. I never knew what it was like to be “north.”

A space that embodies northness for me is Connecticut. My idea of northness is college, being at Fairfield University. Aside from physically being north of where I grew up, being in Connecticut is an internal journey. It has forced me to leave home, and fend for myself. Peter Davidson argues in The Idea of North that, “A voluntary northward journey implies a willingness to encounter the intractable elements of climate, topography, and humanity.” It took courage to leave where I considered home in New Jersey to come to an unknown land of opportunities. It was not until I changed who I was that I was able to really experience what it was like to be north.

Davidson says, “In everyone’s mind there is a line drawn across the maps, known to that person alone, of where ‘the north’, in the sense that means more than ‘north of where I happen to be’, begins.” This line is a moral line that you cannot cross unless you change. Once you cross this line, you can achieve your own personal north. For me, the boundaries accompanying my journey northward included getting over my shyness, homesickness, and dependence on other people. Once I changed these negative attributes to my personality, I became successful at Fairfield.

Davidson says that traveling north is a space that is hard to get to, and is not easy to obtain. Prior to attending Fairfield University, I never saw myself as ‘naturally smart’. I was a straight A student, but I had to work for it. My grades were a direct correlation with my willingness to put in the time and effort. I was forced to teach myself how to learn. My acceptance to Fairfield University was not a shock, but a relief; my hard work had finally paid off.

Traveling north to Fairfield University was a risk I was willing to take. Being away from home for the first time left a lot of room for failure. I had to find a new niche that I could consider to be “home.” I had to create a routine
and be willing to be flexible. All these changed I made allowed me to have a successful trip north.